I have been quite driven by creative pursuits. My life in general is rather flakey. I never really got my life together. It is probably just a part of my mental state as well as life choices that I simply never chose because I was lost in wool gathering. I am glad my children are of better mind and action. Making sure they do things that are beneficial rather than lost in a world of dreams and vagaries. Even though I am more aware of what I have done I am still in the same boat. It is just how my mind works. I surround myself with technology and start writing, making quick videos and sometimes painting or drawing. I am simply lost in my imagination. My Dad who has schizophrenia pointed this out to me one day. I was surprised but it was a good observation. My Dad had studied social work before he was diagnosed and booted into oblivion by employers.

I am currently in the beginning stages of a new piece of writing which is more a thinking process than a story. I put attitudes in correlation to each other and measure them in a way. Fat lot of good it will do me but it is interesting and a pursuit nonetheless. If I was driven by money my attitude may have been different. It may have had a point other than a mind exercise. This is simply my lot. I succeed by failing to understand the most basic workings of society. Though in my own way I can see the dangers inherent in concentrating on money. I can see a world of disappointment that I am trying to demystify. It is a danger I face to simply write myself into irrelevance but it is a creative pursuit regardless.