The writing below is quickly noted down as I think about a topic. Everything is debatable and writing can be at once a moment of clarity that can be connected or disconnected. I feel like writing has created a lot of distance in my life. Take for example when I had been jotting down random ideas over a decade ago or longer the writing was very strange, stranger than how I write now. I once sent some loosely written ideas to my high school art teacher which was more about the experience of alienation from falling into psychosis. It was a stream of consciousness that paved the way for some work almost a decade later. It was met with a stoney silence which is understandable, I read a few books on writing and developing a writing voice that is more mainstream. I found a voice that I felt worked for a couple of stories which were all slightly different. Some people have abandoned me over writing, writing is very much a sharp weapon to possess, even though I am terrible at grammar and make a lot of mistakes with writing I can manage to hold a story together or get an idea across. The writing was probably too much to share but over the years I have written tens of thousands of words in articles with no credible credentials in blog posts about a variety of topics.
I am not very original and everything has been done before but I get points for effort, even though writing can push the world further away, you need distance for any creative pursuit. The first person to unfollow me some time ago for writing was actually the big-name street artist who I don’t even need to name on that first foray into turning people into products called dot dot dot. Writing is both a blessing and a curse, you always need a cheer squad and or an institution, I am grateful though for throwing ideas around, society needs to create distance just like writing does. Maybe distance is a way of putting things into categories, that fits there, that is pretty good there bad there I won’t go on about it anymore. Even though I write critically about the culture I live in, I am not unhappy and don’t have ideas that the grass is greener somewhere else. I just want to clean up my own backyard, I would like to see less disadvantage, I mean every day I go to work through the city and see the homeless. I am not saying it is entirely everybody else’s fault or society’s fault as I am just as much a part of the system as anybody else but everyday I see it and I try to ask questions and find answers to understand it.
“Not everything is political. If you went out on the street in China and screamed death to America you would get arrested for being a pest. That is more cultural than political. The reason western countries make everything political is so they can circumvent and disempower other cultures. There is no other reason. Look at the evidence. Look at the narratives in the media. It is all designed to destroy ‘the other’ culture through supposed good deeds for the other’s proposed bad deeds. What is slander and politics but a way of whitewashing and finding ways to colonise and use soft imperial tactics to tarnish other cultures? People just get confused by the name, democracy and freedom become a mask for a monster that haunts the minds of citizens, who then live in hope that it must be worse somewhere else. Wake up, your own anxiety and depression are caused by the society you live in. It is harsh, and unkind and hides behind a mask like the movies it produces to keep you afraid, in the darkness, happy to slander ‘the other’ in the hope that the lies are actually the truth.”
“We have become indoctrinated into a cinematic life brought about by big tech. What is different is even more alien to us. Where does this fit we think, who is this for? What market does it cater to? Being stubborn and embracing insanity is a lonely path that few can afford. When I first started writing I had a psychotic voice a disjointed view that was alien. I had to read how to develop a voice for a structured story. Even then the audience disappears into curated realities. Why do you need to think when big tech can think for you? You say one extreme or the other but all extremes squeeze through the tiny holes in the fabric of censorship or algorithms. Writing becomes even lonelier as the algorithms sort through the winners and losers. Everything is censored. Our brains are the censors. We cross out our own thoughts every day. What we really think and want to say gets buried deeper. If you are truly free, you will be truly mad.”
I suppose writing is embarrassing, and unfortunate and highlights inadequacies but it also can free you, we live in a prison of words and images. Society is imposed on us, creates us, and we create a society in return and without words, we can’t navigate, we can’t see the traps, the joys, the sadness the happiness and as I have said in a story isn’t it about time we wrote ourselves into the stories we want rather than be part of the stories imposed on us. That is aerosol writing and Hip Hop, creating the reality you want and need so not to destroy yourself and following the paths of destruction mapped out by a society that is blinded by ambition that is more so a fight for survival in a system of imposed scarcity.