Feeling a bit depressed

It can be hard dealing with certain people, one person can be relentless in their pursuit of what they want. I feel emotionally drained after dealing with a certain person and trying to keep the peace for what has been an age. You can have people half your age expecting everyone else to pick up the slack. At the same time I quite like this certain person and their unique character. It is just that people who are not in the immediate vicinity can start to see the patterns and start asking questions. They start wondering why this person is never around when they are sorely needed. My solution was to expect nothing from this person and if some slack was picked up I was simply grateful and continued to be self-reliant.

When someone who has been difficult is culled it doesn’t magically make everything better, in some ways it makes things harder. Hopefully, that is only in the short term, but I will miss this character even though I have had conflicted and repressed feelings of wanting to give them a serve on many occasions. It is hard when someone can’t change their behaviours no matter how you approach them. You try the soft approach, the slightly pressured approach, the full-on losing your cool approach. Nothing works, you have to work around them, you have to modify your own behaviours so as not to keep losing your cool. I could have kicked up a fuss quite a while ago about them but kept my lid on.

This person was untouchable and relentless, their lack of self-control had already put other people offside. It wasn’t just me who was in the pressure cooker, yet I wanted to keep things running even though it wasn’t exactly a great situation. Eventually, this person crossed more boundaries of what was acceptable and it wasn’t the first time. The problem is, that it can set off a chain reaction. You end up with a situation which is even worse than the initial situation. Yet how long can certain behaviours go on? What are they going to do next? If you can’t reach a middle ground, a set of sane boundaries where you can rely on them are things actually sustainable? The funny thing is, this character doesn’t have to take any responsibility but eventually they will have to because that is how life works. They were useful don’t get me wrong but they made things work around their own agenda first and foremost. 

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